Tips on Life

Excuses on being Late to School

"I don't know."
"My parents lost the key to my cage."
"The bus dropped me off on Mars."
"I was brushing my pet giraffe."
"The bed took me to another dimension."
"My hamster locked the door."
"Someone told me to count my hair."
"Mum made me cook for the whole of Spain."
"I think everybody's too early."

How to Escape from Aliens

Lock the door and make silly noises. If an alien gets into your house, sing "Humpty Dumpty" but change "Humpty dumpty sat on a wall" to "Humpty dumpty sat on a UFO".
This will hypnotise the aliens and make them jump into a UFO.
Wear pink sunglasses all the time and pucker your lips when you talk. Bring a pendulum around and tell the time wrong, so the aliens will think their time on earth is over.